Saturday, March 05, 2005

Mentally Alive

Nearly four years ago I started blogging with the hope that I could better understand the forces which control our lives. I'd write about politics and society. I've still got that blog but I want a new start. Perhaps a new perspective and new readers will stimulate me for the better.

I have been a teacher for the past two years. I started for a corporate test prep center, teaching the ACT, SAT, and GMAT. That wasn't too lucrative or rewarding but the thrill of standing in front of a room of students led to Miami Dade Public Schools. I've forced myself to wake up disgustingly early and find my way to the high school from which I graduated. Here I'll explore the racial, pedagogical, and managerial issues I've faced and continued to face.

In order to keep my master's degree in Decision and Information Science (it's like MIS) somewhat relevant I've been teaching at a local private college. That's been another eye-opening experience. My students have been prison guards, substitute teachers, deputies, and nursing aides.

Teaching has become my life. I use technology to help us learn as we look back. I try to give my students a shot at something better. We learn about history or computers but at the heart of it all is the ability to think/write (the two are interrelated in my opinion). Malcolm X summed it up for me, "I knew right there in prison that reading had changed forever the course of my life. As I see it today, the ability to read awoke inside me some long dormant craving to be mentally alive."

I've been taking graduate courses at a local public research university (FIU) and trying to spend my free time learning history as best as possible. But I don't want to overwhelm my students with massive amounts of facts or impress them with my ability to recall facts. But they are respected to do one thing: think about our history.

We confront bias constantly. We spend class periods debating whether anything at all can be learned from the study of history. We deviate from lesson plans. Sometimes they deviate too far and need to be reigned in. I won't take yelling or pushing. I don't have all the answers but I won't let the disinterested punks ruin the intellectual experience for the rest of them. At least I won't willingly let them do it.

Here's my introduction to blogspot. Other careers offer more money, respect, and longer lunches. But for now I'm terribly bitten by the teaching change. Of course it is the weekend and I had no screaming teenagers yelling outside my door. Through the successes and failures, these are my experiences trying to bring their minds to life. Any parallels to prison are purely incidental.

Of course learning takes place every second of every day but school is a good place to learn how to socialize without resorting to violence. It's my goal to create an atmosphere conducive to the free exchange of ideas. I'd rather have an interested class learning from each other than a file of 300 completed worksheets. Most learning of that sort is simply forgotten in a few hours, if not minutes. Getting the kids passionate about the subject has led to slapping (religion can do that to people) and chaos. But the second year has been more managed chaos than the first.

I've made mistakes and been told I'm lousy. Perhaps I would be better pursuing some doctorate study and finding a quiet place to read all day. Perhaps these kids need a drill instructor. Perhaps I have the wrong approach? Once again, here I'll confront such questions.

But I'm open to advice from fellow teachers and I know I've reached some of those kids. When I think about it, my job during the day is to teach about genocide and imperialism. History isn't a march of progress. But there are flashes of brilliance and inevitably they'll make me laugh.

Teachers need to be perpetual optimists, something I've never been labeled. But this is my journey.

1 comment:

Finally Woken said...

There's something about the pursuit of knowledge that makes one feel incredibly alive.

That you're guiding individuals along that path as a part of your own journey makes it all the more admirable.

The diversity of those you encounter on your teaching adventures allows you to learn from them almost as much as they learn from you; it's like a symbiotic relationship for intellectual enhancement.